It never ends…

Our Mr. Sam is back in the hospital.

Yesterday, Adam and I made the hardest decision we’ve had to make since he came home. We decided he needed to be admitted to Children’s. His vomiting/not breathing issues were a huge reason, but also his eating has regressed even more and his soft spot has been feeling fuller.

The last time I cried that hard was the day he was vented and we found out he had Group B Strep. I couldn’t even bring him in; Adam brought him and stayed with him all day. Feeling like we failed as parents was the hardest thing. Obviously, we know we did the best we could, but it just got to a point where we couldn’t risk his safety because we wanted him home with us. Sam needs 24-hour care until we can be 100% positive he won’t aspirate or stop breathing and not revive himself.

Right now it’s one of two things – either his shunt is malfunctioning or he has severe, severe reflux. Either sucks. But are fixable.

Adam and I are both very, very private people and having people know what’s going on is a double-edged sword. But that’s what this blog is for… Letting people in on our daily struggles and successes.

We’re doing okay, but missing our little peanut an incredible amount. Visiting him in the hospital is just not the same. Seeing him there brings my PTSD front and center again. I hear the alarms going and want to throw up. We can’t get him out of there soon enough!

Here’s a few pictures to make this sad post happy 🙂

1st time bathing together!

Mya licking Jack's feet... for a good 5 minutes

Sam leaving....

Love you Peanut! You'll be home soon.

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8 Comments Add yours

  1. Grandma Laurie says:

    Trish and Adam, you are fantastic parents. Absolutely wonderful parents with a beautiful connection with your little boys. Sam and Jack are so lucky to have you.

    In fact, God decided that he made one child so perfect that he wanted to create him into two. And He gave them to YOU knowing that you were the perfect parents to raise them.

    Sam is in the care of wonderful doctors and he has you and Adam as his advocates. Just like Sam’s t-shirt says “FIT TO FIGHT”, it’s not just him fighting, but you, Adam, and Jack fighting alongside and for him.

    “Team Sam” is praying for him. Whatever is thrown at Sam, he always handles and with you, Adam, and Jack with him along this most recent battle he’ll be well again soon.

    Love you.

  2. Carol & Elton says:

    Hi Trish & Adam–So sorry to hear about Sam being back in the hospital–I’m sure it was much harder on you to make the decision to take him there than for him to actually be there. Stay strong and keep the faith knowing he’s getting excellent care and will soon be coming home to you feeling better than ever. We’re keeping sweet Sam and all of you in our prayers. Take care….Love—Carol

  3. Kaylie says:

    Trisha & Adam
    Hang in there! Your little Sam is a fighter… I have experienced that from the first day he came to Children’s. And having you as parents makes his fight a little easier because he is not alone, your unconditional love and support will help him come home to you soon. I’ll stop by after work and see you all this week!

  4. Gretchen says:

    Oh Trisha,
    I have to tell you, I am just in tears reading this post. I cannot imagine how hard it would be to see my little boy in the hospital. It makes me sick to my stomach. You guys are obviously wonderful parents. You’re doing such a good job of watching out for your little ones and your vigilance is going to keep those boys safe and healthy. I’m thinking about you and praying for little Sam. Hang in there mama. You’re doing a great job.
    Gretch

  5. Randy & Nancy says:

    Keeping all of you in my prayers. Hoping that Sam will feel much better soon and be back home with Mommy, Daddy, and Jack! Take Care-
    Love you guys…..Nancy

  6. Jamie & gang says:

    Ahhh- sad to hear this about Sam the man… sending hugs and prayers your way and praying for good news in the upcoming posts. Sam is a fighter and he wouldn’t be able to “fight the fight” without his mommy, daddy, Jack and the hospital staff! Hang in there- Go team Sam!

  7. Shannon says:

    Just a little note to say hi and to let all of you know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Like all the replies above say, Sam is a fighter and he will get through this. He is very fortunate to have such a great family waiting for him to come home! Hang in there and stay strong! With lots of love-Shannon:)

  8. theStoryofV says:

    Trisha,
    I am so so sorry about Mr. Sam…I am in tears reading your blog. Being a new mom is hard enough, and having twins on top of health issues and going back to work, buying a house, I just can’t even imagine. You and Adam are rockstar parents. Keep smiling, you are all in my prayers tonight (and for a while).
    God Bless!

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